Five Weird Graves in Paris

Ian — Fri, 17 Jul 2015 19:40:41 +0000

As all good Paris tourists do, we visited Père Lachaise Cemetery. In this post we skip the celebrity graves, and focus on the strangest things we could find.

1. Siamese Dead Guy

This one really gives a whole new meaning to “turn the other cheek.”

I heard he was a two-faced son of a bitch

2. Too much sadness for just one wreath

If there were some lightning bolts or eagles or something this would be wicked metal. Instead it’s just sad.

At long last I have found it. The gothest thing in the world.

3. Father, dog, children. In that order

This one takes a little interpretation. I read it as a monument to the man on the middle tier. Above, in a position of honor, is his father. At his level, his loyal dog. And scrabbling for light, down below the dog’s feet, are his two spindly children. I’m pretty sure my mom has something like this in her will.

Stack ranking for all eternity

4. The Escapee

Must have been amateur hour at the cemetery. Everybody knows that step 1 is to make sure they’re dead before you lock the door.

The window was forced… from the inside!

5. The Mysterious Bulge

That’s a curios polishing job. Yep. People.